Online dating is a new thing, in fact its the new "thing", exciting, unexplored mysterious waters, stimulating new experiences. This is where u really get to know the personality and character of that mysterious "crush". Dirty linens are exposed to the public, vulnerabilities are left to chance, trust is gambled with, limits are tested, fantasies revealed and not to mention visually and imaginatively enriching, kinda like standing on a ledge, eye closed and trusting an invisible voice to guide you to safety. Definitely the online version of Yolo.
The trick is getting the one person whom you are in sync with, thoughts, ideas, theories have to merge together effortlessly, two minds fitting perfectly like opposite ends of a jig-saw puzzle. As they say you must and will kiss many frogs before you find your prince charming/princess.
Compatibility, especially verbal and ideological synchronicity is important, undeniably vital. Considerable room should be left for the highs and lows of an exiting and unpredictable new adventure, one should muster enough courage to wander off into the unknown, Experience new and exotic types of emotions (unfathomable ).
A consistent kind of happy (like a friend of mine put it), always anticipating the next conversation, speaking out your heart without reservations about the consequences or fear of judgement, letting loose, swimming to the deep end of the pool, jumping off a cliff without the subconscious reassurance of a safety net below you and occasionally dreading the inevitable blackouts. Tell me, doesn't that sound Utopian?
Not necessarily a romantic connection, it could still be a mutually exclusive and symbiotic appreciation of each other's views, ideas, diction and ingeniousness, however bizarre or socially unacceptable the rationale, eventually a connection it still is. In fact, the more irrational the better. To me, weird is the new normal.
Boredom could and should be defined as as the state of being weary and restless through lack of interest, apathy or concern, which can be relieved by an occasional chat with a friend, digitally or face to face, that right there is my own personal definition and remedy.... As I said earlier its not always about "love" or romance, occasional flirting and perverseness is an excellent sign of a healthy friendly relationship.
Granted, any relationship is an equivalent reflection of a marriage, During the first days, things tend to be more heated up and exciting, questions need to be answered, gaps filled, buttons pushed (ladies tend to be uniquely gifted and better at this) .But ultimately the true and sure most test of friendship is time, no one wants to be stuck in a rot (missionary all the damn time). Then and only then you will know your true friends. Funny how I managed to roll of the point and weave a connection between online dating and true friendship, don't know how i got there, maybe i should dedicate this post to all my true and soon to be friends, maybe i just did..Mnajijua (i was told anonymity ni muhimu)..... cheers to meeting new people!
Friday, 29 May 2015
Monday, 2 February 2015
TAKE A CHANCE.
In retrospect i have always wanted to "blog" or better yet chronologically string up thoughts that could be appreciated over a forum like this. But shit almost always doesn't turn out as you'd want or hope, every time ad take my laptop and try my best to put together a story and to my surprise ad always end up blank. Maybe i was trying too hard at that particular time or maybe i really didn't have anything to say. We are always told "follow your dreams". Follow them i shout in agreement too....Surprisingly something phenomenally unforgettable has to almost always happen to you for you to realize that "blank" space in your life you are yet to fill. For me that has to be blogging or better yet touring all over the world. To accomplish the latter I would have to actually have saved a significant amount of money..a feat I am yet to achieve, but blogging I can and could start anytime I decided best, so I settled on the former.
It actually started out as a dare from a close friend, kind like how adolescents make a significant amount of their life changing decisions. I literally needed a nudge into reality, like I needed someone else to believe that I could actually do it, almost like I needed to hear them say it. Self doubt is realistically real, a vice that most of us undoubtedly do posses, its like a chronic illness, dragging us down insidiously and with astonishing deception ( chini ya maji ), ridding us of our most precious talents.
I like to think I do posses some sort of talent, a talent that enables me to literally comprehend the ups and down of the English diction, to maneuver through the hidden bends and invisible curves of phrases woven together with words and eventually understand what is being put across. Astonishingly, my friends always make fun of how I talk, words don't flow smoothly out of my mouth with the same effortless ease as when i am jotting them down, pronouncing some of them "big", "bizarre" words becomes next to impossible, so I (or rather, most of us) have adopted this ingeniously modified form of English that we refer to as "sheng" that makes communication way much easy especially among age mates. Its a well crafted mixture of both English and Swahili, poetically strung up together whilist adding a little bit of this and a little bit of that. It honestly has a nice ring to it. If you literally heard me talk, i am inclined to think you would be awed, but that's just my opinion. My point is people already have and will have to get past some challenges for them to nature their talents, please don't get left behind. Cheers to exploiting our talents and enjoying the many benefits they will offer!!
It actually started out as a dare from a close friend, kind like how adolescents make a significant amount of their life changing decisions. I literally needed a nudge into reality, like I needed someone else to believe that I could actually do it, almost like I needed to hear them say it. Self doubt is realistically real, a vice that most of us undoubtedly do posses, its like a chronic illness, dragging us down insidiously and with astonishing deception ( chini ya maji ), ridding us of our most precious talents.
I like to think I do posses some sort of talent, a talent that enables me to literally comprehend the ups and down of the English diction, to maneuver through the hidden bends and invisible curves of phrases woven together with words and eventually understand what is being put across. Astonishingly, my friends always make fun of how I talk, words don't flow smoothly out of my mouth with the same effortless ease as when i am jotting them down, pronouncing some of them "big", "bizarre" words becomes next to impossible, so I (or rather, most of us) have adopted this ingeniously modified form of English that we refer to as "sheng" that makes communication way much easy especially among age mates. Its a well crafted mixture of both English and Swahili, poetically strung up together whilist adding a little bit of this and a little bit of that. It honestly has a nice ring to it. If you literally heard me talk, i am inclined to think you would be awed, but that's just my opinion. My point is people already have and will have to get past some challenges for them to nature their talents, please don't get left behind. Cheers to exploiting our talents and enjoying the many benefits they will offer!!
Friday, 26 December 2014
STRIVE TO BE BETTER!
Have you ever felt let down or actually let down a close friend? Am talking about the kind of friend you'd "take a bullet or catch a grenade for". Made or received an empty blank promise void of any sign of actualization. Fucked up in such a proportional way that you couldn't bear to look back at yourself in the mirror. Mistakes may be of varying extremities, from innocently forgetting your best friend's birthday to biblical abominations like "slicing" your best friend ( masticks). Someone i consider wise once told me that friends and family are a reflection of both what we are and what we have in this world. Friends psych us up (chocha), console us, persevere our tantrums, distract us from the harsh/scorching reality that we don't want to face and of course support our uncannily stupid ideas at their own risk. Thus we should never take them for granted.
Its easy to forget the little things that make life worth living, the same little things that wouldn't be possible without friends or family, the warm sense of safety they ooze, the selfless way in which they extend an olive branch in our hour of need, the simple self assuring way in which they tell us "everything is going to be okay" especially when everything seems bleak. Again i repeat, we should never take friends and family for granted.
When was the last time you told them (you know who :-) ) that you love them, appreciate them, value them, treasure them or even did something special for/to them to make them believe that indeed you are grateful for their presence in your life. Surprisingly, the grievous purely unintentional mistake that most of us (you and me) usually make is to assume that the other party somehow subconsciously knows how we feel about them. We think being sentimental is overrated or its a sign of weakness hence we are left to silently hope that they will figure out on their own, luckily some eventually do, what of the others who don't?. Love is like a puzzle to us, hidden under layer after layer of silent, subtle actions.
Take time to show love when need arises, apologize when you are on the wrong and most importantly try your best to be the best you possibly can. Truthfully this particular article was inspired by a close friend of mine (iza mel.B*). Cheers to putting pride aside and trying to be better friends!!
Its easy to forget the little things that make life worth living, the same little things that wouldn't be possible without friends or family, the warm sense of safety they ooze, the selfless way in which they extend an olive branch in our hour of need, the simple self assuring way in which they tell us "everything is going to be okay" especially when everything seems bleak. Again i repeat, we should never take friends and family for granted.
When was the last time you told them (you know who :-) ) that you love them, appreciate them, value them, treasure them or even did something special for/to them to make them believe that indeed you are grateful for their presence in your life. Surprisingly, the grievous purely unintentional mistake that most of us (you and me) usually make is to assume that the other party somehow subconsciously knows how we feel about them. We think being sentimental is overrated or its a sign of weakness hence we are left to silently hope that they will figure out on their own, luckily some eventually do, what of the others who don't?. Love is like a puzzle to us, hidden under layer after layer of silent, subtle actions.
Take time to show love when need arises, apologize when you are on the wrong and most importantly try your best to be the best you possibly can. Truthfully this particular article was inspired by a close friend of mine (iza mel.B*). Cheers to putting pride aside and trying to be better friends!!
Thursday, 25 December 2014
THE STRUGGLE!!!
As an average medical student (referring to the kind of grades i get,of course!), i came or was it more like landed on a harsh reality last semester that ad love to share with the other "struggling" medics out there. The ingenious "eureka moment" is/was that being average just doesn't cut any more. This doesn't by any chance imply that i am dumb or slow ( if u get my drift :-) ), only that i don't put in as much effort or hard work as i should, when you put that statement in context it does have a shockingly similar familiarity to those like me out there who have an unmistakable "lazy" glow about them.Don't get me wrong, am not implying that i or that most of us don't have that unquenchable thirst for medical knowledge. U should see us, squeezed or hurdled up together into tinny cliques, trying damning hard to explain the unexplainable, debate the unsubstantiated or even more frequently try to move heaven and earth in order to support our vaguely incomprehensible theories, (discussions get heated up, tension almost tangible, suddenly you realize that books like Robbins or Grey's anatomy were made sorely to confuse you) does that image in any stretch of your imagination give u an idea of how passionately engulfed and involved we are in our carrier of calling
The challenge actually comes into the picture when a good number of us try to balance our social, academic and personal life, shit actually gets crazy. Some of us especially the ladies are paranoid about "love", subconsciously they want to experience it before time "runs out", then of course you have to factor in those ladies that have already been "scared" by love and want absolutely nothing to do with it (casual relationships work best for them). Don't get me started about the "gentlemen", u know how competitive guys can get especially when it comes to who has dated the most number of ladies, the hottest ladies ( socialites) or the most sought after " catches", just because u are a student of medicine it doesn't necessarily mean that you shouldn't chase after these highs and lows of life..we are told time after time.
Oh! Getting back to the realization i made earlier last semester (somehow i think i got off topic), balance is possible but unquestionably hard. Life is all about taking risks, truth be told its my professional opinion that life without risk is not worth living at all!. Be bold enough to attend that talked about party and pull an all nighter if you have to, be bold enough to find that "time" to flirt with that lady you have been eyeing for a while, take those briskly moonlight walks with her, take her out on dates and whisper sweet things to her. (for ladies the vice versa is applicable). And at the end of the day remember being "average" just does't cut anymore...try and be a little more above average. Put in that little extra effort, attend a little more lectures, make time for a few more group discussions and pay just a little more attention in class and maybe, just maybe your life in medical school will be a little more bearable. Cheers to being an above average student!!
The challenge actually comes into the picture when a good number of us try to balance our social, academic and personal life, shit actually gets crazy. Some of us especially the ladies are paranoid about "love", subconsciously they want to experience it before time "runs out", then of course you have to factor in those ladies that have already been "scared" by love and want absolutely nothing to do with it (casual relationships work best for them). Don't get me started about the "gentlemen", u know how competitive guys can get especially when it comes to who has dated the most number of ladies, the hottest ladies ( socialites) or the most sought after " catches", just because u are a student of medicine it doesn't necessarily mean that you shouldn't chase after these highs and lows of life..we are told time after time.
Oh! Getting back to the realization i made earlier last semester (somehow i think i got off topic), balance is possible but unquestionably hard. Life is all about taking risks, truth be told its my professional opinion that life without risk is not worth living at all!. Be bold enough to attend that talked about party and pull an all nighter if you have to, be bold enough to find that "time" to flirt with that lady you have been eyeing for a while, take those briskly moonlight walks with her, take her out on dates and whisper sweet things to her. (for ladies the vice versa is applicable). And at the end of the day remember being "average" just does't cut anymore...try and be a little more above average. Put in that little extra effort, attend a little more lectures, make time for a few more group discussions and pay just a little more attention in class and maybe, just maybe your life in medical school will be a little more bearable. Cheers to being an above average student!!
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